What would Louise do?

Last week I had a great coaching session with the lovely Kath Newland at New You Coaching.

I walked in there curious to see where it would take me, because I figured I'm pretty happy with my life at the moment!

Anyway, in chatting to Kath, I said that while yes I am happy with how life is progressing, I guess I am missing a piece of the puzzle...

Inspiration.

I'm definitely enjoying the work I'm doing. I love that it's not full-time (ha ha!), its flexible and fits around my life and I can do it from my own home. I really like being able to help others by using my writing powers for good and I love the different people I'm meeting. Some of their products and skills are incredible and I'm stoked I now know about them!

And I'm feeling rather content with my personal life.

With the perfect bloke by my side for 10 years, an awesome bunch of family and friends, great health, a funny little pooch to hang out with each day and a little one to welcome into our family in less than 3 months time.

Aaahhhhhhh!

But what it's time for me to include again is more of what lights me up inside.

And part of that is getting a few different ideas underway and putting the wheels in motion to start a new business that's more geared around what inspires me...ooohhhh...but more on that later!!

When Kath asked what's holding me back, all I could really come up with was just starting!

So in amongst a bunch of great ideas and strategies, one question Kath asked me was who could I model my actions on?

Who could inspire me?

Instant though - Louise Hay!

She's built her empire in the mind-body/new age arena, but not solely for financial gain - because she's passionate about helping others.

So Kath then suggested if I'm thinking about something to do with my new business (or life in general I guess) I could ask myself...

What would Louise do?

I was able to apply it instantly and get results - it lifted me out of my own head and helped me see life from a different perspective.

And I realised that I've also got a bunch of great examples around me that I can use for 'What would...do?'

There's Tania at BizEez.

Tania's grown a part-time project into a thriving business doing what she loves..and it only keeps getting bigger for her!

There's my soul sister Kylie.

She hosts Wellbeing Workshops each Friday to introduce the 5 year olds at her school to meditation, yoga and affirmations - I love how open and confident she is about sharing her passions!

There's my Grandma and Nanna. 

Grandma kept it simple and said thank you many, many times a day for everything in her life...and my Nanna was an expert at making lemonade out of life's lemons and always figured that there was someone worse off than herself (keeps life in perspective!).

Not to mention my family.

My fabulous husband and the McEachen 5 all live by do what makes you happy.

And I know if I thought about it - there'd be excellent models scattered all throughout my life!

It's been a great week since meeting Kath, because it's gotten me recharged about following my passions and life purpose.

And most importantly, doing that by just starting to bring it back into my life a little bit at a time.

I'm going to print this photo of Louise & I out and stick it on my wall to remind me to ask myself when I need a bit of help to move forward...

What would Louise do?

So now the question is...to help you move forward with something in your life, or just to put a different slant on things...

Who can be your model?

Testing...testing...is this thing on?

Well hello there and yes it has been quite some time since you've seen this little blog in action!

7 months and change, and it feels nice to be back on the blogging bus. But boy does my life look a bit different to what it did back in February!

So without further adieu, here's a quick wrap up of my life at the moment...

I'm 27 weeks pregnant!

This is definitely the biggest and most obvious change to my life this year. And one I'm super excited about! Our little beebee is due 12/12/12 and yep, we're hoping its got a sense of occasion and comes out on that day - talk about a cracker birthdate!!

It was a good few years in the making (we definitely didn't fall into the category of Nathan only having to look at me and I'd be up the duff!) but that's a-whole-nother story I'll get to in the coming weeks.

Being pregnant has taught me plenty of things...but best of all, it's been a fabulous journey for me which I've absolutely loved, and I've felt fantastic the whole way along.

We have a pooch!

Not long after I wrote the last blog, we fell for a little Kelpie X with funny little ears at our local petshop...and decided to make Lola part of the McCliffy family.

Well that definitely had its lowpoints at the start, but it rocks now and we love our little pupster!

I now run my own successful business from the comfort of my own home

And how. Giving up full-time work and becoming my own boss was definitely one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life.

I get to use my writing powers for good for a variety of people, do it when I want to and add to our bank account - noice!

Ah, but I know what you're thinking...that's all great Jess, but what have you learnt this year? Plenty!

Simplify

This has been one of the key parts of my year this year - simplifying my life. As you know, I used to have lots of ideas and plans flying about, and liked to fill my time with a myriad of stuff.

Well this year, I've been doing the opposite! Deciding to leave full-time work was the first part, and it was all about getting my life and health in better balance.

And just quietly - once I became pregnant, I didn't have a great deal of choice but to do less! I found out that there would be days that I'd just need to lie on the couch for 3 or 4 hours because I was pooped...because you know, my body was doing an absolute world of stuff!

That and my brain just didn't have the room. Getting my few bits of work done each week, looking after the pup, making time to rest and watching the changes to my body was well and truly enough.

What I also found interesting, was that once I found out about becoming a mum, a lot of the other things I'd be rushing to do or cram into my life just kind of dropped away.

I became really quite content knowing that this year was about our little family growing and that the other things that I'd like to do (be it study, travel, start new enterprises) - well they'll all happen at some point, but I don't need to think about it for now.

Not that it happened instantly - I do distinctly remember a conversation with Kylie where I was saying about feeling like maybe I need to be doing more (be it study, starting up ideas I'd had, etc) and she said the best thing...

Jess, growing a baby is enough for this year!!!

But I think this has now given me a reference point...knowing our little one comes into the world late this year then sort of plots out the timing for a few other things. And it'll all unfold when its supposed to.

Trust...everything happens at the right time

Boy oh boy, was this one that got tested the past few years. Exhibit a) was wondering when on earth it was finally going to be the right time for us to become parents!

This year, I've become a lot more relaxed about timing in general, holding onto my belief that everything happens exactly when its supposed to, and that the Universe always, always brings us what's best for us.

It's affected the little things, eg not stressing if I'm going to be a little late for an appointment - I'll get there at the perfect time. And who knows why I need to be there then?!

Also knowing that we'll keep getting the clues we need to move forward with what we're doing.

Oh and another big thing was trusting I'd made the right decision to leave work...and then, that work will keep flowing in.

And it was, and it has!

The other big part of trust this year has been trusting myself and my intuition. Bodywise, this has meant going with what I feel like eating and doing, knowing that body and beebee know what they need. Took some getting used to, but hey - why fight it if you want to eat chocolate!!!!

Also I've become soooo much better at trusting the little intuitive nudges and ideas I get - and I've been doing pretty well to act on them, even if I don't know where it's all leading to!

Live in the now

This is definitely the best thing that Lola has taught me this year - yep I've now got a pup as a teacher too!

Anyone with a dog (or any animal really) will know that they only live in the now, they don't know any other way.

So Lola coming onto the scene was perfect for me, because she reminded me so many times to just focus on whats happening in this instant.

That and we've had lots of fun this year, playing in the now!!

It's all about balance

Again, the whole reason I made the decision to leave my job last year was to find more balance in my life and as it turns out, I've managed to achieve that!

I went to an Ayurveda appointment a month or so ago to check in and find out about the Ayurvedic approach to being pregos is...and the dude was most impressed that my doshas were all so in balance. Look at me go!

It's definitely what I credit for my current situation...for me, I think being able to bring my body and mind into a pretty good state before I became pregnant has lead to having an awesome time of it.

No morning sickness (which has made many friends want to kick me!) and none of the other side effects a lot of other people get...just feeling balanced and if anyone asks me how I'm feeling/going, I can honestly say 'I'm excellent'!!.

So getting back to balance, I'm doing pretty well with the work part and rest...although as I've found this last month, I do need to remember that while I'm in the glory stage of being preggas (aka 2nd trimester and start of 3rd) where you have the most energy - there's still a lot going on inside and I do need to make time to rest each day!

My focus at the moment is just weaving a bit more play back in, which I include as doing things that make me smile and light me up inside.

Just like this blog!

So yes, you will be seeing more of me on here which I'm quite excited about. I really haven't done much writing at all this year for myself personally - it's turned out to be a year of dealing with things as they occur by thinking or speaking about them.

But I still heart words in a big way, so I'm back baby!!!

PS I love this pic of Lola - I was playing around with my new fandangled Digital SLR and she walked right up to the lens...huh, what's all this about?!

The only way to change your life is to do it yourself!

I think I’ve forgotten this!

There’s a few things that I’ve been wanting to change about  my life, but have realised I’ve been waiting for it to magically land in my lap…or if I whinge enough then someone else will do it for me. Ha ha!

And whinging really isn’t my style. In fact it feels awful!

It's made me feel so unbalanced, and it just feels unnatural…not the happy, laid back being that I like to be!

I much prefer being positive, looking at what I want, putting it out there and following the bread crumb trail the Universe lays down for me…

Backed of course by writing often to celebrate my wins, delve further into my life and let go of any old patterns – staying in my head with my thoughts is a crowded place, the instant I put it on paper it’s amazing what comes to light!

And did I mention keeping my thoughts focused on the positive - it's amazing how much lighter I feel when I stick to this simple little trick!

But I’ve allowed myself to get dragged into the quagmire of stagnant thinking by my ego who’s role is to keep me from changing, improving and in general getting out of my comfort zone!

I don’t like this, I don’t like this…I wish this would change…why are they doing that…it’s not my fault (ha ha, my own personal favourite!)…

All in all I’ve been doing way too much in my head and not getting it out. The sneaky thing is I hadn’t realized how much was hiding until the last week or so when I started saying it out loud.

So what now?

#1 - Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change

This little saying has had such a profound effect on my life any time I’ve thought to apply it!

You know when you feel stuck about something and suddenly you see that little glimmer of light that there is another option…

How much better do you then feel when you realise you can change something about the situation!

The simplest flip is to look for the positive in something rather than the negative.

Quickest way to do that – in the midst of whatever’s happening, say ‘I’m grateful for…’

You can always find something to say thank you for even if not everything’s going ‘right’ for you.

It could be ‘I’m grateful that this is showing me exactly what I don't want'!! Or 'I'm grateful to be learning something new about myself...'

Another other good trick - taking a step back to say all in all my life is great, and there's definitely stacks of people who are worse off.

Not to mention lifting up from the problem to see how in the grand scheme of things, this is a very small part of my life!

Don't believe your ego when it tells you it's a life threatening issue...chances are it isn't!!

#2 - Be the change you want to see in the world

I’ve done a cracking job of acting like a victim of late. Blame’s a powerful tool of the ego, trying to convince you that it’s not your fault!

But who’s the person making each choice in your life…no-one else can think for you!

Yes they can give you plenty of input, giving you ammunition to say ‘well it’s not my fault…they convinced me…’

But at the end of the day – you are the only person who can think for you. You are the only person who can make each choice, take each step etc etc.

So time for this Princess to suck it up and start taking full responsibility again!

And that in itself is a great feeling.

Saying to myself ‘I take full responsibility for my life’ makes me lift straight away.

Taking responsibility for my own life has such an empowering effect. It brings me back into the realm of solutions, rather than focusing on the problem.

#3- Choose to choose your thoughts!

I’m a big fan of the law of attraction, it just makes sense to me.  In it’s simplest form, I see it as creating self-fulfilling prophecies.

Hence why I’m often heard to say ‘well if you think that’s going to happen, then it will’!

How I feel and what I say creates my life…and I haven’t been guarding my thoughts and statements enough lately.

I’ve been letting a bunch of sludge hang out in my head and come out of my mouth!

As the lovely Louise Hay says – every thought is an affirmation.

So by complaining, you’re affirming that you’d like more of that in your life.

Conversely, by choosing your thoughts and making them positive, the results are instant…more things to be positive about!

And so now I’m sure you can connect the dots… by focusing purely on what I don’t like – I’m creating more off that!

#4 - Stop trying to stop the flow, just sit back and enjoy the ride!

In the past month or so, I’ve just felt like I’m either swimming up stream, or just been trying to jam the oar in to stem the flow.

I’ve had the lovely combination of either trying to force things and being impatient…or sitting back and whinging about what isn’t changing.

So now I've decided to get out of my own way!

Stop taking life so seriously...relax...and whenever I feel like I'm forcing things, I'm going to put up the white flag and say universe, your move!!

Because after all, I know that everything is happening in the perfect order and it will all be revealed just at the right time!

So I thought I'd leave you with a photo of me sitting on the beach at Byron last week...a great example of where I had a few moments of aaaahhhhhh.....and boy was I grateful for it...

And PS - Kristin & Lisa, this one's for you! Thank you for reminding me of my now 5 week old promise to write more blogs again!!

I'm back baby...bigger and better than ever!

I hadn't realised it had been so long since I posted my last blog, but it's nice to be tapping away at the keyboard again...and you'll definitely be hearing from me more often.


Boy have I had some great kerplunk moments these last couple of months.


There's been plenty of great lessons, plenty of unravelling and 'oooohhhh that makes so much sense now'!!! 


I've also had so much to smile about!


In general I feel like I'm at a much more contented place which is nice. 


It was funny because I hadn't realised quite how much had been simmering away under the surface until it all came spilling out in a few conversations.


Anyway, I'll stop speaking in riddles and get onto one of my kerplunks.


Lesson # 364 - Just because I have the time doesn't mean I have to fill it up!


In my last blog, I said about how I was going to work on identifying where I was overcommitting....say it out loud...and make a change.


And I'm proud to say I've achieved all of that. Not to say I'm perfect now, but my life is a lot different to the couple of months ago!


Anyway, getting back to lesson #364 and something I noticed fairly early in the unravelling...


Just when I started to create a bit of space for myself I seem to fill it back up again, and not with something for me.  


So why did I need to do this? Well I came up with a few ideas... 

• Because I can 
• I've got the time, so why not help someone else 
• So others don't think I'm lazy! 
• I enjoy helping 

All of which are quite valid reasons, but this knee-jerk reaction to fill up my time for someone else's benefit was keeping me away from doing things that I wanted to do for myself, or as Sonia Choquette puts it - doing what feeds my soul.


It was only a week or so before my last blog that I heard the Dalai Lama say...you need to look after yourself first. 

And that he makes sure he takes care of himself first so that he has the energy to help others. 

So if it's good enough for the Lama - it's good enough for me!! 

Another part of lesson #364 has been learning when to say 'I'd love to, but maybe later'.


This was given a huge helping hand when my fabulous soul sister Kylie set me a challenge:


To not take on any more new things this year.


Sounds simple doesn't it. And as soon as she said it I said 'you're on'!! 


I love it - it makes so much sense, yet it took Kylie saying it to realise that it's exactly what I needed.


The best part is - I've stuck by it.


What I've set about doing these past couple of months is just ticking off what's already on my plate rather than adding more.


It's all about clearing the decks!


And so far it's been working a treat - exhibit a) having time to sit down again to write my blog.

Another huge shift in my life has been changing my expectations.

What I realised was that I'd been putting sooooo much pressure on myself and spinning myself into a frenzy...an internal one of course! 

I'm a bit clever really because I hadn't even noticed myself, then it all came tumbling out at a great rate of knots! 

In my mind, everything had to be done now.

And of course, good luck with that! 

What it turned into was having a huge to do list every single day...not knowing what to start next...or just beating myself up for having not done things I said I would.

Bleurgh! 

Now I'm making it my mission to be realistic about the time it takes for me to do things...and more importantly being open about that and telling the people involved. 

Because for a long time it's been the source of stress and why I end up overcommitting and underdelivering. 

What I figured out was that it's a bit hard to know what I can do in a day/week/month/year if I don't know how long it all takes me.

Oooohhhh - why didn't I think of that before!

This little insight has literally revolutionised my whole working life and home life!! 

The final thing I've cottoned on to of late - I only need to take the next step.

Not the next 7, just the next 1. 

It was another thing I hadn't realised I was doing, but when I took a step back I could see why I was getting a bit frazzled over things - I wasn't breaking it down enough and was trying to do it all at once.

Aren't I a good little Gen Y - I want it and I want it now!!

Anyway, the good thing is, I've worked out how it feels when I'm jumping ahead to the next step...or 50 in front! 

And the good news is I've been listening to those intuitive nudges and taking a deep breath!

Speaking of the next step - I've started running.

Yep me - a runner! 

I was asked if I wanted to do the City to Bay a couple of months ago and I said sure, why not! I've never ran in my life (darting about on a netball court doesn't count), so I wasn't really sure how I'd go.

But I've loved it!

In itself, it's a great lesson in just putting one foot in front of the other rather than thinking too far ahead.

And more importantly - that you never know what you can do until you try!

So I thought I'd leave you with the photo of me before my first run - which by the way was a whole 2km without stopping, look at me go!!

I'm excited and inspired!

And I just wanted to share that!

It seems like my blogs for a while have been all about fixing something that's wrong or me feeling like a sad sack.

Well at the moment - I am literally buzzing with energy! 

I've had a great morning so far - yummy, healthy breakfast, yoga outside in the breeze (or winds of change I was thinking!!) and beautiful sunshine, caught the last part of a Sonia Choquette live call (I love her!), brainstormed about how I can create a better work/life balance...and it's only 11.11!

So what's inspiring me...

Change is in the air!

• My kerplunk-a-thon has brought up a bunch of stuff that I can work and change - for the better!
• And the best part is - I'm really ready to change and take action!

New beginnings are here...

• Like I said - I've been brainstorming about how best to balance work and life, and I'm looking forward to putting that into place shortly.
• I've also been brainstorming about what it is that I want to do...with my career, Live.Love.Grow., life in general - and that's so much fun! No quicker way to amp yourself up than to spend 10-15 minutes focused purely on what you love doing and things that make you happy!

I'm surrounded by fantastic support!

• Be it my ever loving and supportive husband Nathan who is always there for me and helps me no end!
• My fantastic circle of friends who are always ready and willing to listen to me ramble without judgment and offer great advice!
• The McEachen famblee who let me be me and are only a phone call / email / car trip or plane flight away!
• Hayhouse Radio - boy has it given me some great and timely advice of late!
• Not to mention Divine guidance, there's been a stack of that of late too!

I'm on the path to living my life purpose 

• I'm literally busting with ideas at the moment, and one of my goals at the moment is bringing it all together into one spot - one of the fun tasks I've got today.
• Then it's all about picking the things I want to do and taking it one exciting or challenging step at a time.
• Yes I'm a little bit afraid - but I'm also filled with excitement about putting my hand up and saying 'yep, I'm ready to do this...I'm ready to be different...make that I'm ready to be ME'!

We're making our house, our home...

• In the last week, we've pulled down the pergola and cut down a couple of trees, so it's aloha backyard and brand spanking new verandah that is coming soon (good thing we know someone who can put it up!)
• Not to mention putting the primer on the walls so it's bye bye big bird (I know you loved the yellow walls Mum, but it's time for a change - he he!!)

So it's all happiness, flowers, sunshine, butterflies, lady bugs and rainbows here!!!

I Googled rainbows and got this - pretty close I think to summing this sentiment up perfectly don't you think!

Love to you all!

Oops I did it again...

Ha ha if you now have Britney Spears in your head, but it seemed the most appropriate title!

So what have I done again? I've manifested the symptoms of a chest infection and sore throat.

And how did I manage that?

Because I've had 'too much to do and not enough time to do it'...I haven't had any time to rest...I've got so much to do and I don't know what to do next...I just want to get this done and it's taking forever, so I can't start something else...my to-do list has been weighing heavily on me...

Recognise some of these?

I'm a big believer in the mind-body connection...in fact it's the integral part of my life's work to be a healer.

At any rate, the crux of it what the mind-body connection means to me - my words and thoughts create my world.

And I've got a cracking example of that from this week!

I started feeling a bit chesty and throaty last week, to which I thought and said 'oh here we go, this always happens when I've got too much going on in my world and I get a bit overwhelmed by it'. 

I really wanted to have the day off on Friday, but didn't! 

So on Saturday, I thought nope, had enough of this and started turning my thoughts around. And instantly felt better!

But here I am on Monday, still with the symptoms...I think partly because I really wanted to have a day off! Instead of marching on with me affirmations and releasing this...I think I kept it going so I wouldn't have to go to work today!!!

Or because part of me wanted justification...'see I have had a lot going on - I'm sick because of it'

No I'm not - I'm sick because of the thoughts I've chosen to think about my last week or so! 

There's often plenty of different things going on in my life, but I'm not a walking chest infection. Hence why this is such a classic version of Dr Mona Lisa's saying 'you don't need to remove anything from your life, just your interpretation.'

I've got the bin out ready!!!

The first thing to remove is my self-fulfilling prophecies - 'I always get this when I'm tired and have too much on.' That and 'Don't worry, I'm not contagious, this is my own special brand.'

Then there's the standards I create for myself...

• I have to use all of my time "well"
• I have to get it all done
• I have to do it all now
• This is taking too long
• I should have had this done before now

Then there's the sayings...

• I'm so busy (this is a post in itself that I'll get to another day!)
• I've got too much to do, and not enough time
• There's not enough hours in the day
• I just don't feel like I'm getting anywhere

Urrrggghhh - I feel worse just reading back over all of this! 

Turning it all around now into affirmations that help to keep me healthy...

• I am happy and healthy.
• I allow my body to return to it's natural state of great health.
• I always have more than enough time to do everything I need to do.
• I'm surrounded by help and support.
• Everything happens in the perfect Divine order.
• I'm always in the right place at the right time, doing the right thing.
• I allow my mind to relax and be at peace.
• I live in the now and take life one step at a time.
• I am safe. All is well in my world.

Ahhh, that's feeling better!

I'll get on to affirmations more another day, but essentially they're based on thinking thoughts that make you feel good. 

Some people scoff at affirmations or ask why would you bother? 

I defy anyone to say that their main motivator isn't to be happy. So when I've got a choice to purposely think a thought that makes me feel good/happy, I choose that every day of the week! 

I forget sometimes that I do have that choice, but as soon as I remember, I'm on the bandwagon well and truly.

Ok, well back to rest and recovery...or should I say removal and replacement. Out with the old negative thoughts, in with the new, happy and healthy ones!

Happy Monday!

The moments that stop you in your tracks...

A couple of hours ago, I got a text from my brother to let me know that the brother of one of my primary school friend's decided to take his life earlier this month.

So as I sat down to eat tea with Nathan at our favourite restaurant Star House, I had that much whirring in my head that I said 'Sorry I have to be rude for a moment and write something down here' well type it onto my iPhone - same same...

It's such an incredible sadness in itself - particularly considering he was only a 24 year old boy -  compounded even moreso by the fact that their dad did the same only a couple of years ago. 

I couldn't help but just feel overtaken by sadness, the thought of that happening in my family is just...

But doesn't it help put your own life in perspective. 

I'm not saying that my or your own worries or issues are any less valid, but you know what - do they really matter? 

In the grand scheme of things - for me I have to answer no! 

I have a fantastic life and I love living - and I'm so glad that the thought of not wanting to wake up tomorrow has never even entered my mind.

I love my family, I love my friends, I love myself - my magnificent mind, body and soul. 
Perhaps this was the wake up call I needed to stop sweating the small stuff and to get back to enjoying life, not taking it so seriously and to be grateful for everything that I have.

Wow I feel like I've been punched in the face and want to burst into tears (and I did have a few tears behind my glasses!) 

But at the same time I want to take this moment and use it.

It's so funny because I was only talking to my workmate Lisa today about how there is always someone worse off than you - something my Nanna used to always say, right to the end of her life, and it's inspired me ever since. 

And if this isn't proof of exactly that I don't know what is.

Life is precious.

Live. Love. Laugh. Be happy.

And may you now rest in peace James. My heart goes out to your beautiful sister and mum especially, as well as everyone that knew you and is left to pick up the pieces. I hope they're able to celebrate all the good times while they mourn and try to adjust to not having you here anymore.