What did you say?

The eagle eyes amongst you might have noticed that I started my last blog by saying that I'm finding insights, rather than the traditional Elmerism of hunting.

That's because I've been watching what I say and write of late so that it matches what I really mean, or more importantly what I'd like to project into my future.

Because as the legendary Louise Hay puts it...

Every thought you think and every word you say is an affirmation.

Some call it creating self-fulfilling prophecies...others say 'be careful what you wish for'...but all in all, I believe that the words you use shape your future experience.

Anyway, getting back to choosing your words wisely, here's two examples to get you thinking...

I can't wait!

I noticed a few weeks back how much I used to say 'I can't wait' a lot.

It was generally because I was excited about what was going to happen - but not that I literally couldn't wait for it happen.

When I thought about it, I realised that it implies wanting to jump ahead and not experience the moments that lead up to it.

It makes sense too, because I am working on releasing the need to be impatient!

As Louise puts it, impatience is just resistance. In many cases, it's resisting what you need to learn or experience along the way...or in my case, it was often not relaxing and having faith and just letting it all unfold as it needs to.

It used to manifest in a negative way back when I was having many an anxious moment - I would just want something to be over now so I didn't have to go through it.

But I think now, it had just become a habit.

Well not any more!

Since I noticed, I've worked on picking myself up anytime I go to say it and changing it.

Instead of I can't wait for... 

I now use I'm so looking forward to...

Semantics I know, but it does make a difference.

Saying 'I can't wait' brings in a sense of frustration and impatience...trying to pull it into your experience quicker.

Versus 'I'm looking forward to' which is about hope, excitement and being happy for it to happen when it does.

It almost makes me feel like I'm going to be unwrapping a present...ha ha ha I just realised that I would be - the present moment!

Should

This one little word is an absolute cracker. The first time I was introduced to what should means was when I did an anxiety workshop many moons ago.

In essence, the moment you mention should it creates right or wrong. 

It can also establish a rule or a standard that you think you're supposed to live by...and if you don't, watch guilt come in!

Or if the should is pointed at another person, enter anger or annoyance for them not living up to your standards.

My solution: ditch it! 

Getting back to Louise Hay, she puts it briliantly in her book You can Heal Your Life, where she says that any time you feel a should coming on, replace it with I could or I could choose to...

I should do that today.

I could choose to do that today.

See how much lighter it feels!

What other body changes do you notice? Shoulders lift? Head lift? Anything else?

In a great article that my lovely friend Ellen sent me, when you use 'should' in relation to another person - whose rule are you using?

And are you trying to put responsibility onto that person when in fact it's not their rule or standard and the way the other person acts is out of your control.

He should have let me know about that.

I would have liked it if he let me know about that.

There's a bunch of other words that I could talk about here...

In my opinion, never and always get bandied about way too much without actually being true...'knowing my luck' is just a great way to keep bringing more of the same into your life...'things always happen in 3's' even though plenty happen in 1's, 7's, 300's...and I could go on!

But anyway, your homework for this week is to notice what you say and what you write.

Don't become obsessive about it, but just notice if you say something often and how it makes you feel.

Does it make you feel good? Do you actually want that to come true? If not, is there another way to say it?

Are there any sayings or common words that you use as a habit, but don't actually mean?

Kick them to the kerb and replace with something better!

Have fun!

Time to get back on the horse!

I was thinking this as I was walking up my driveway just now, that I really need to write a blog post tonight and get back on the horse because it's been too long.

Then literally, just as I finished thinking it - in the distance a horse neighed!!!

So really, how could I say nay to that kind of encouragement!! Ha!

The last week or so has been an interesting one - I've been following an old pattern of trying desperately to finish off things and start new ones at the same time...without much success in either arena.

Well that's bollocks really - I'm definitely getting somewhere with cleaning and organising our house...I've gotten rid of a whole bunch of stuff (anyone who's come to our house hasn't walked out empty handed!!)...and am pretty close to having everything sorted.

And I suppose from a mental perspective I've done a fair bit of housecleaning too - noticing some old patterns that I need to chuck out and replace, or just give a good polish to. Not to mention that I've had a stack of kerplunk moments...you know the ones when the ball suddenly drops!

I guess the part that's irritating me because it's all taking longer than I expected and I just want to be done!

I'm itching to get to the new stuff!!

When I've got certain things I feel I need to finish before I start anything new...all the new ideas start to build up, and I feel a little bit overwhelmed and like I don't know what to do next, and I've got all this stuff to do and not enough time to do it, and if only the world would just stop for a moment and let me catch up...!!!

Hence why I'm getting a build up on my chest at the moment - because I've been feeling like it's all piling up on top of me.

The antidote? Get organised! 

The only surefire way I've found to counteract this is to write it all down and get a bit of a plan happening...once it's on paper in front of me, I quickly realise that I don't actually have that much to do, and I've got plenty of time to do it.

That and I need to remind myself that it's ok if not everything gets done right this minute. It'll all happen just as it's supposed to.

But then what am I missing out on if I stop to plan?! 

Welcome to the tennis game I've got going on...often unbeknownst to me unless I stop to pay attention to what I'm really thinking. Or my body lets me know...exhibit a, the heavy chest.

Here's a photo of our spare room floor at the moment...it looks like a big fat mess, but I've already put a bunch of stuff away so I know I'm getting somewhere and it won't be long until it's all clear.

And I think that's a pretty good analogy for my life right now.

There's a lot on the sorting pile at the moment - and it's all becoming clearer by the moment.

I just need to focus on it being clear, not the state it's in right now!

Just another great example of needing to focus on what you want...not what you have, or don't have as the case may be!

Ahhhhh, feels good to be back.....